Haha just kidding... I just checked my email.  Have I told you lately how much you rock?

I am BEYOND jealous =)

Hmm still no email from you, missy.  Better get to it... lol.  Like you don't have a busy enough life already.
-Alisha-

i wish pot was legal too. it makes no since for alcohol to be legal but weed isn't. i redid the math and technically i have about a week left i can smoke and still pass a drug test, but we're broke:'(

nope i felt like shit for making it a whole 24 hours then blowing it. if only my husband never got hungry, it'd be so much easier. i'd kill to have his metabolism, he eats all the time, and he's freakin skinny. he's 5'11 and about 155. man i cry knowing he's only a few lbs more then me. he's bony and i get so jealous. he wants to gain, i want to loose, that's life i guess.

you have such a busy life, i admire you. i wish i could have that kind of energy, the only time i get energy to keep going like you do is if i'm on drugs:(

Hmm ok so I tried emailing you twice to that address, that's the one I have saved.  I'm assuming you've gotten neither?  You should just email me and I'll reply, lol.  alisha.leesha@yahoo.com

Love ya, darling.
-Alisha-

Hey -

Suffering is ALWAYS interesting. haha.

I aim to please :P

Ash

hey,

Liberal Arts was always declared so TECHNICALLY once, but if thought about a lot. Yeah, I wanna work for Country Weekly in Nashville

Well, HELLO Wonder Woman!  Lol. 

Seriously, where do you get all this energy?  Can I borrow some please?  You are so motivated and ambitious, it's incredible.  That's awesome you're auditioning... awesome and yes, insane.  I can't wait to see how you plan on finding time for all of this!  Do you have a magic trick where you can add hours to your days?  Lol.

Good luck at the auditions, you know you'll be great.  And hope you did well on that test of yours =)
Love ya!
-Alisha-

PS:  Did you not get my email?  I swear I thougt I sent it to the right address...

first of all your georgous ;)

and yeah I've heard that california has been real ass holes when it comes to gay marriage. there's probably something going on in Washington(where I live) but I'm on the east cost until dec 1. oh well.

I guess one way to describe my crazy ways would be that I have obsessive thought patterns. Once I get my mind on something or someone it's all I think about. I chop it up and a....yize every single, little, miniscule piece of it. My own conclusions and thoughts drive me absolutely nuts. Whether its about Brandon, Tim, my car, work.... anything. It's like it just takes over my entire brain.

Thanks for the comment, I really like hearing what people have to say. Oh! I also left BeautifulFreak a comment telling her to add you.

Take care hun!

I just gotta say I love reading your diary.

Anyway, everytime I write an entry I keep thinking of how you said my diary was so much cooler when I wasn't talking about Tim all the time. The only problem is, he's consuming my thoughts and I don't know how to make it stop.

Meh.

Anyway, you said in one of your comments you wanted to say some stuff about Tim. Feel free, I'm actually dying to hear what you have to say. Here's my email if you don't want to post it on my diary: Pinkybubblebutt@yahoo.com

I know it's hard to try to fight your inner deamons. I deal with those bastards every day as well. Chin up hun! You're pretty amazing!

Much Love.

Why is it that the "knife's edge" is the most comfortable place to be?

I wish I had your honesty.  I'm sure its obvious, but I don't write about real stuff.  Just the nice little icing but not the cake. 

WOW you look hawwwt!  Lol.  Absolutely stunning, girlie.
Hey...guess what... I'm writing a letter to you, fucking FINALLY.  Just thought I'd let you know.  Probably need to get a new address to send it to, right?  Anyway.  I'll email you.

So perdy... love the hair.  Ex is cuuuute too, wow. =)

Love ya-
-Alisha-

Well, I have 2 books. Love and astrology, and The Only Astrology Book You'll Ever Need... I'll have to read them again to get a generalization, but I will do that when I get home.

Later girl!

I also got an Obama shirt from tshirthell.com. if you go to the site, it's the first shirt on there.

ahh, it's grand. :)

good luck with the weight loss, im in l2g too :)
take care
Sammi

I'm sorry to hear about your grandpa...my thoughts are with your family.

On a brighter note, glad you're enjoying the writing:)

sorry about your grandfather. i hope you're doing okay. can't wait for picture updates, you're so beautiful.

[fadingobsession]

You are absolutely correct. A lot of people just don't get tested for it.

I hope your allergy tests come out all right.

And my condolenses for your grandpa! :(

I'm sorry your grandad passed.  Although, your synopsis of the whole event ends up being fairly amusing (I hope that is not an awful thing to say). 

I like the way you write- I'm sure your novel is going to be awesome!

Cara.  I love you.  Thank you so much, lol.  I needed you to read my entry.  I keep beating myself up but it's nothing, really!  You fucking rock, you know that?

Oh and as far as the pot thing goes... the only reason I hate it is because I had an ex who used to get stoned all the time and he'd be agressive when he was high, like, hit me and stuff.  So I think those memories have lingered and have given pot a bad name for me.  And the smell is rancid, in my opinion.  But yeah, to each their own =) 

And thank you... thank you so much.
-Alisha-

No.

You can have a gluten sensitivity which just means your body can't deal with it properly. Kind of like lactose intolerance. It bugs you, but won't kill you. Where as people with celiac disease cannot have gluten AT ALL because it basically destroys your intestines and it's a really nasty disease.

But no - there is no such thing as a "gluten allergy".

Sorry - gluten allergies don't exist... But I have to ask - are you a celiac? I kinda feel for you though! I'm allergic to wheat.

They actually say that being on a gluten free diet is the best diet you can be on, because gluten has zero benefits for your body. *shrug*

Nice pic! And you're safe to talk about Tim.... my diary is semi now

Oh hun, I would never tell you not to comment on my diary. I'm a firm believer that everyone has their own oppinions, and should be free to express them. If I didn't want anyone to comment on my diary I would make it private. I take all comments, put them into my brain... and do what I want to do anyway . It's just nice to know what other people think about the things that are happening in my life, and maybe they can provide a little insight, or a clue that I may have missed.

Yeah, I know I probably shouldn't talk about Tim as much. The only reason I do is because I have no other outlet for all of my thoughts.

So feel free to tell me your oppinions. I love to hear them.

yay!

can't wait for picture updates:)

[i'll be gone through monday though, unless they have a computer where i'm going]

[fadingobsession]

i have 0% trust for obama

i feel were screweed

funny thing, it makes me feel better when i woman hits on me then a guy. when i pretty woman complements it feels more real then a guy, guys would fuck anything women are normally picky:)

sorry you felt bad, if it means anything to you i had a drunken weekend as well. after a very stressed out week. sunday i mixed brandy with tequila, bad idea, after 11shots and this little bottle of kamikaze burst, i was done for. i spent half the night puking. i felt 10lbs lighter the next day though:)

hope you're feeling better now.

That's been happening to a few of my fav's. It's so weird!

Glad you had a blast this weekend! And good for you for standing up to your "friend". Seriously, what the hell are guys thinking sometimes? It's like they think they're dick is the best and we should be doing anything we possibly can to get it. Are they not aware that there are billions of men out there with the same equipment? Retards!

Glad you're doing well. Good idea about the "generic" costume! Take care,

- Chris

thanks for the spell check

BUT i know how to spell the word but i like my way better---considering it is MY diary i spell things how i think they should be spelled.

thanks for trying to be so helpful

Thanks for the tip

I kinda guessed it would hurt but i just wanted to make sure.

ily x x

I have terrible skin, also.  My face is so oily I must wash it a minimum of 4 times a day.  Like just a second ago, I wipe the back of my hand on my forehead and there is a oil spot on my hand.  It is so bad that I can take a flat hard thing, like the back of a comb, and sort of scrape my face, and there is liquid oil on the comb.  I've been trying to drink 60 oz of water a day and no improvement. And of course, with oil comes blackheads.  My chin is completely speckled.  I'm like a Monet, alright at a distance but upclose, strange.  lol  Any tips for a crazy oil production?  I haven't been eating meat which helps and I don't eat fried foods.  I couldn't imagine the state of my face if i did! 

I am so proud of you for sharing your story.  WHich is sort of strange to say, since I don't know you, but I am proud nonetheless.  Hopefully through hearing your story, it will save some kid from going thru it. 

I just love the spirit of this entry.  Your beautiful;)

OH  have you tried the Christmas Celestial Seasonings tea?  The sugar cookie is wonderful. 

How old was the lady that spoke before you? Was she older than you/the students? If so, they probably related to you better because they felt you were "on their level." Still, they shouldnt've did/said mean stuff to her. I hate when 'rents flip a bitch, not cool. I'd give anything to so to one of those skin treatments, they sound fucking awesome

Good luck at the pageant, hope you win

YAY!!! I'm so happy you liked my idea and did the grateful thing. I actually got the idea from Jewel though. She inspired me to do it and now you're doing it. You're supposed to do it for 2 weeks EVERY night, BTW. Can I tell Jewel you used it too?

I had acne in third grade too! I was the only one! It was horrible too, REALLY BAD acne. Luckily, in like 7th grade it just cleared up all by itself and never came back. I guess I was luck to go through it early and not in my teen years. I'm sorry you have to deal with that too, as I know how bad it is.

Sucks about your parents going off, but that's really cool your little brother stood up for you!

Take care,

- Chris

[MsChrispy]

Assuming you're talking about the tummy pic one... I was 145lbs.  So, 9lbs less than I am now.  But my tummy will never look like that again, because I'm a mommy now. I have the stretch marks and such now...

BUT Mayla was worth every mark =)

Haha! You just reminded me I need to get my ass in a tanning bed soon! And you are a very busy girl. My head would be spinning for sure.

Hope that lady can help you with your skin. I wish they could fix acne scarring. I have it kind of bad.

he knows how i feel about food. heck when he takes me out to dinner our last conversation at the table usually consist of i need to puke,please, please, please, lol.

right now i don't think he really worries much at all. actually i'm pretty sure he agrees i'm a fat ass. i said something about my size yesterday and his reply was "i bought you a treadmill".    :'(

Ok I seriously feel the same way. I haven't felt the same since I tripped and I never thought I could change so much so fast. And it's not something I can just talk to anybody about so I'm glad you feel the same way. Good to know I'm not alone in that thought. So thanks lol.

By the way...you're so pretty! The third picture is my favorite hahaa.

oh my goodness, you are beautiful!!!! =] you look like you know how to have a good time!! =]

heyyy :)

how've you been?

i've missed you!

Lovess

Hellarockstar!

xxxx

Thank you. I guess I never wrote about being a teacher because I figured everyone would have something negative to say.  "You smoke pot...I don't want you teaching my kids..." "Your liberal minded..."  You know what I mean.  That and I never have much time to write a real entry.  I just wait until something is bugging me and I get on here and bitch about it.  Thats why most of entries really do not portray the real me.  There's lots I don't mention, simply because it isn't boiling over.  Did you know I make (and sometimes sell) salsa?  LOL  Like i said, this diary just captures the boiling over emotions that I do not have anywhere else for.  I wish I would make time to really write, coming more from me than raging emotions. 

[thatpotsmokinghippy]

Hey -

Living expenses are fine in comparison to a weekly wage. Say, hypothetically, you had a basic job, like working in a cafe or bar, or a clothing store, after tax you would have around $550.

To rent a one bedroom flat, you'd be looking at around $175 per week, and it wouldn't be that great. On top of that you pay your own electricity, water, phone, everything. But that's reasonable here.

If you were using public transport, that's cheap, but you need to be organised because it's not the best or frequent arrangement.

Food is not cheap, not expensive. By comparison, of course. I have a friend who is horrified that we pay $16 for pasta here, but that is in line with everything else here, that is not expensive.

What else do you want to know?

Ash

 ha ha loving the below comment.....

Anyway looking forward to the speech! 

I was wondering if you were still sthink of writing a book.  There is so much of life and so many experiences to be had, you couldn't possibly write an autobiography yet.  Maybe it would always be this way, but I know when I finished your autobiography, I'd be disappointed not knowing what she ended up doing and such.  You know what I mean? 

I hope you can find a way to help your brother.  I know how hard these eating things can be, I'm sure he will be much happier dealing with it now rather than ten years from now. 

I thought that it was ironic that you began your "best" entry with "write freely, without intelligence"   This was far from "without intelligence"  lol

Hey girlie...

Wow how exciting, you're writing your story!  That takes some courage.  I remember once trying to do that, write my story (of course this was when I was 17 years old and in the midst of my self-destructive behaviors... not a good idea) but I gave up after the whole thing started to get too personal.  You can definitely do this!  I'm sure of it... Got a good head on your shoulders.  Ooo I hope you'll give us little previews and such.  Good luck with that =)

-Alisha-

Hey -

I used to crave the 9 to 5. Figured it was how I was going to 'get ahead in this world', to 'achieve' something, to 'make it'. Law was my ticket to 'success'.

But you know what? I'm 23 years old. I have no ties in this world yet. No responsibilities. I don't want to throw my youth away so I can be a 'big thing' when I'm 40 and it doesn't even matter anymore.

So fuck it. I'm only taking one semester of my degree next year (I finish the first one this year). Then I'm kicking my heels up and heading overseas for almost 7 months.

I know there is much you want to do with this life, and you're doing as much as you possibly can. Don't beat yourself up over having high expectations. It's much better than having low expectations.

Just remember to be young though, too. Be impulsive, and have fun.

Ash

Yeah, going to work high probably isn't a good idea, though I know some kids in my class come to school high or even get drunk DURING class (they bring iced tea or something else that's not exactly "iced tea"..) and no one ever notices.... I only know cause they've told me, tben I can see it. But yeah, I'm glad you didn't do it.

Wow, that was so nice of him to tell you all that! You must be a great model! Do you have any pictures? I'd like to see some if you don't mind.

Take care,

- Chris

I'm also catching up on my Favourites.

Ohhhh, that's horrible about the robberies, and the persons shooting themselves!  That's just heartbreaking!

I hope you have fun with your friend, and I also hope you enjoy your day off.

God bless.

Candy

hehe. i saw your comment on becominganorexic's diary on her food entry. you said "aw you ate, how embarrassing". i couldn't decided if you were being sarcastic[i assumed you were though] or not, either way, i laughed my ass off. i don't know why but it tickled me.  just had to stop by and say thanks for the good laugh i needed it.

enjoy your blunt, glad you got settled.

ttyl-fadingobsession

Hey -

Congratulations! I'm glad you're settled in and ready to go.

Ash

Congrats honeeeee!!! I would send you some moving in items if I could.  But I know its the internet and all.

Ok, I'll give you a present in another way.  Check my diary when you can.

xoxoxoxo

P.S. 

I have to live vicariously through you, I never had my own place.  Straight from my parents house to living with my now husband.

YEAAAH, I'm so glad you took the ACV=Apple Cider Vinegar!!  Its sooo good for you and gives you that boost of energy. 

Yeah, I had went private for a minute, I was scared someone had access to my shit. I'll probably do that off and on.

****************************************

Virgo seeks someone she can give her all to, and treat with the utmost consideration and respect, thus she sets very high standards for those she may choose to share herself with.

I'm a Gemini 

****************************************

I'm VERY excited about an aromatherapy book I just got.  I'll have something for you in my next entry that I think you'll like.

[SecretConfessions]

One word comes to mind for you missy....

DRIVEN.

Congrats on the new place to yourself, I'm sure you'll find a brand new type of freedom there.

Hey -

I'm so glad you got your own place. I think it will be really good for you.

I'm definately keen to share your pictures.

Ash

Aiwha-wha sauce? 

I think the debate was a draw.  And honestly I respect McCain for wanting to put off the debate.  Obama, McCain and Biden are all Senators.  As in, their job is to legistlate;since we're in a financial crisis similar to the Great Depression, I kinda want them to do what my tax dollars tell them to do: make laws.    A debate could've been pushed back to Monday or even Tuesday, but this ecconomic crisis is going on now.  Right now I could care less about what they're going to do in the future because what's going to happen in the next few weeks is going to affect either presidency. 

Congrats on the new place

Aw thanks girl, you're way too kind. And thank you so much for your help with the vinegar! Have you noticed a difference since you've started doinig it? I'm becoming desperate here with this whole weight loss thing and I'm hoping this will give me some extra help, because as we all know this process fucking sucks! haha.

You sound like one hell of a busy person, good luck with that schedule! Also, congrats on the new place!! The possibilities are endless when you're roommate free...embrace it and bring home some strangers...just be safe! haha take care.

-does happy dance for Zen-

YAY!  I'm sooo excited for you! You totally deserve it.

congrats!

XOXOXO

Kristen